


Thriller

by LadyDianetti



Series: Dianetti [1]
Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dreams, F/F, Major Character Injury, Temporary Character Death, Undead, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:55:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23699620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyDianetti/pseuds/LadyDianetti
Summary: "You were dead, Detective. How is this possible?""Who cares? She's alive and that's all that matters."...Rosa Diaz finds herself at the mercy of a group of criminals she was supposed to be infiltrating, and they're not very merciful. Luckily for her (or unluckily), some higher being clearly wants her to remain alive.
Relationships: Charles Boyle/Genevieve Mirren-Carter, Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago, Kevin Cozner/Ray Holt, Rosa Diaz/Gina Linetti
Series: Dianetti [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1702696
Comments: 19
Kudos: 73





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> UMMMM not how I expected my first fic for this fandom to be, but here we are :) i love me a bit of supernatural angst :D

Ears ringing, breath hitching, pain spreading. It's all Rosa can do not to scream. Or maybe she is screaming. Her throat burns. Her lungs burn too, like she's been held under icy water for hours.

Everything has gone to shit, for lack of better word and now they're onto her. Stupid rookie detectives and their lack of experience. She's not sure why the Captain wanted the kid with her on the operation in the first place- why he didn't choose Peralta or Boyle. At least they wouldn't blow the mission. Not this bad anyway.

It doesn't matter, either way. The kid had been caught and she hasn't seen him in God knows how long. Few hours. Maybe a day. She'd called for backup not that long ago but they haven't arrived yet. She hopes they'll come soon enough to catch the perps and get her out of the situation but the way things are looking, probably not.

A burning pain blooms from her side and she gasps out in alarm, immediately placing a trembling hand to it. It feels wet and sticky and through her heavy lids, she can see dark liquid in the gloom when she pulls her hand away to look at it. It's probably not the only place she's bleeding judging by how much she's aching all over, but it hurts the most, she finds.

"Who sent you? Who do you work for? The pigs?"

Against her better judgment, Rosa keeps her lips sealed and determinedly stares at the concrete floor beneath her. She won't talk, no matter what happens. Four months she's been undercover, she's not about to blow it all now.

Something hits her back, directly above her spine and she grunts in pain as she falls forward, unable to hold her own weight and whacks her chin on the floor. White spreads across her vision, her hearing goes fuzzy, and she blinks sluggishly. The next thing she knows is she's being dragged to her feet by her hair and then tossed back to the ground where she hits the opposing wall.

"Tell me!"

"No."

She's hit across the face with what looks to be a crowbar and is sent sprawling again, this time to the side. She's almost positive something just cracked in her face. She slowly reaches a hand up to her cheekbone and winces silently at the agony that brings.

A well placed kick is thrown towards her abdomen and this time she can't hold in the the yelp the escapes her lips nor the sob that follows it almost immediately. She stays still, eyes closed tightly as she breathes heavily through the pain. Her head hangs low and her shoulders shake with the effort of her arms stopping her head from hitting the floor.

"Finish her."

There's a click, the familiar sound of the safety being take off a gun and she opens her eyes, turning her head to the left and following the sound. She comes face to face with the barrel of a pistol.

Before she protest or tell the men that the NYPD are on their way, a deafening bang rings throughout the room and darkness invades her vision. 


	2. Chapter One

"NYPD! Down on the ground! Now!" Detective Jake Peralta orders in a loud, authoritative voice as he follows Captain Holt and leads the rest of the Nine-Nine in through the double doors.

Immediately, as expected, the perps quickly stop what they're doing and try to make a break for it. A couple of them escape in the kerfuffle, but fortunately for the cops, most of the perps are captured and handcuffed.

Jake rounds a table littered with drugs and catches one of the perps by hitting his shin with his baton. The criminal exclaims in pain and his legs go out, sending him sprawling on the floor. Quickly, before the man can get back up and continue to run, Jake shoves a knee into his back and begins cuffing him. Once he's done, he pulls the perp up and shoves him in the direction of a fellow cop to be taken away.

He stands back for a moment, hand on his pistol, and watches as the captured criminals are lead out of the gloomy building reaking of chemicals, into the daylight where several cop cars and vans were waiting readily.

As he watches the final perp escorted out of the building by Charles, Amy approaches him and he turns his attention to her.

"Hey, babe," he smiles, "any sign of Rosa?"

"No, not yet," Amy frowns and a crease appears between her brows the way it does whenever she's worried. He frowns with her. Rosa had been the one to call the mission off, claiming she'd been compromised. "Captain Holt and Sergeant Jeffords are searching for her now. We haven't heard from her since she requested backup."

"I'm sure she's all right. I mean, she's Rosa Diaz," he snorts nervously.

"Yeah, you're right," Amy nods with a small smile, seemingly reassured.

"Come on, let's help them look. She can't be too far, right?" Jake shrugs and once Amy nods, he walks away with her by his side.

They wander the building together, checking in room after room. It's a lot bigger than Jake had realised and by the time he gets to the bottom floor, he's growing agitated. During the search, they found another perp hiding in one of the rooms and Amy was quick to arrest her and send her outside to join her fellow criminals. 

After another few minutes, they decide to go to the bottom floor of the building and see if Holt or Terry have found Rosa. 

Before they can exit the bottom of the stairway, however, they're stopped when they run into Terry. He looks sick. Horrified. They pause when they see his expression and share a look. 

"Sarge?" Jake prompts. "You okay? Looking a little ill, there." 

"Yeah, I-I'm fine," Terry mutters, then shakes his head and focuses on them properly, "uh, you can't go in there, though. Go help Boyle with the perps."

"We're looking for Rosa," Amy informs him, "have you found her?"

"I said, go and help Boyle," Terry repeats more firmly.

"But-" Jake begins.

"That's an order!"

"Fine, okay," Jake retorts with some frustration, "come on, Ames."

Nodding silently, Amy follows him back up the stairs, only stopping briefly to cast a look back at Sergeant Jeffords. He's pinching the bridge of his nose and shaking his head slightly.

When Jake and Amy reach the top of the stairs, they head straight for the exit and don't say anything until they're back outside and under the sun. It's around midday. They hadn't wasted much time after receiving Rosa's call, had simply stopped to gear up and form a plan of action.

Once outside, Charles approaches them with a smile on his face and his hands on his hips. 

"Hey, guys," he greets merrily, in his usual Boyle manner, "How's it going? Have you seen the Captain or the Sarge? Have you found Rosa?"

"We haven't seen Holt or Rosa, but we ran into Terry and he told us to leave," Jake huffs and crosses his arms- maybe a little childishly, but who cares?

"Oh, no," Charles frowns sympathetically, "why?"

"I don't know, he was acting weird even for the Sarge," Jake explains. 

"Acting weird?" Charles repeats.

"Yeah, I don't know. Whatever, though," Jake shrugs, "he told us to help you with the perps."

"Oh, that's great, but we don't need help, Jakey," Charles smiles, "they've all been taken in now."

"Awesome," Jake tells him, smiling in return.

At that point in the conversation, Sergeant Jeffords exits the building, squinting in the sunlight. He almost walks straight passed the three detectives, but Jake stops him before he can.

"Hey, Sarge, where's Holt?" He asks.

Terry pauses, looks back over his shoulder then turns away before replying.

"Let's just get back to the precinct," he says and proceeds to walk off.

"Uh, okay," Jake replies to his retreating form.

"You're right, Jake, he is acting weird," Charles nods his head certainly.

Jake also nods, squinting at the Sergeant's back.

"Let's go."

* * *

The return to the precinct is eventful with Jake driving, Amy in the passenger seat and commenting on Jake's driving, and Charles in the back singing along to whatever he'd put on the radio.

It felt like they arrived at the precinct all too soon and were straight back to work (not that they weren't at work anyway, but who actually wanted to do boring paperwork? Well, Amy did). When they enter the bullpen, they find their way to their desks and sit down. They would have to have a meeting soon about their most recent case, but until then, there is a lot of paperwork to get through.

Time drags by slowly as Jake fills out form after form and types up countless reports. He finds himself looking up from his desk more often than not, hoping for some form of distraction, but all he finds is the sight of Hitchcock and Scully being weird.

Eventually, though, two hours after he'd returned to the precinct, Captain Holt and Sergeant Jeffords leave the Captain's office and call a meeting in the briefing room. Jake usually prides himself on being able to read Holt's facial expressions, but as he stares at the man's stoic expression, he realises now isn't one of the times where he knows what the Captain is feeling.

Strange. 

Nonetheless, he follows Holt and Terry into the briefing room and sits down beside Boyle, already leaning back into his seat and getting comfortable. At the table behind his own, he knows Amy is sat ramrod straight with her hands placed carefully on the desk. In front of him, Gina is leaning her head on her hand and blatantly scrolling through her phone, but she has a notepad in front of her anyway. 

For a few minutes, everyone sits in silence. Holt stands at the podium with Jeffords to his right, but he doesn't say a word. It isn't like Holt to be lost for words, but this is the only way Jake can describe the man right now. He sits up straighter in his seat and frowns.

"Sir?" He prompts Captain Holt.

"Right, yes," Holt nods, "squad, I have some unfortunate news regarding our last mission."

Again, he falls silent and beside him, Terry looks down at the floor. 

"What is it?" Charles asks.

Captain Holt breathes in deeply, the only sign being the way his shoulders rise dramatically, then lets out the breath quietly. 

"We have lost Detective Diaz," he reveals.

If the silence before was tense, the way it feels following the man's admission is unbearable. Jake isn't sure what to do or say, and so he takes to staring blankly at the man. He wills his mind to come up with some response, but it fails him repeatedly and he finds himself stuck. 

Beside him, he can practically feel the way Charles has tensed. He hears the way Amy mutters a question in response to Holt. In the desk in front of him, Gina has placed her phone down and sat up straighter. Even Hitchcock and Scully (it suddenly makes sense why they're in the briefing room now) have stopped being gross and are staring at the Captain.

And then it makes sense to Jake. It's all a joke. Just Rosa making some grand return (he doesn't focus on how that isn't her style). She's been gone for months and she wants to return in style.

So he laughs out loud, relieved. Everyone stares at him in disbelief. 

"Is there something funny, Detective?" Captain Holt questions. There's something in his voice, almost a warning, that has Jake's laugh trailing off.

"This is a joke, right?" Jake asks, almost desperately.

"I can assure you, it's not," Terry speaks up. His Adam's apple bobs dangerously.

"Rosa's... dead?" Charles whispers beside Jake.

"Yes," Captain Holt confirms, "we believe that after being uncovered and calling for backup, Detective Diaz was... killed by those she had infiltrated."

It feels like a sack of concrete has just fallen on top of him. Everything just becomes background noise as he stares at Holt at the front of the room. Charles is blubbering beside him, he can hear Amy sobbing at her desk, Hitchcock and Scully are even crying. He can see a tear glistening in the corner of Holt's eye before he blinks and it disappears.

In front of him, he watches as, slowly, Gina lowers her head to her desk and her shoulders tense. He can't tell if she's crying or not, but he thinks she is.

Jake's vision blurs and he lifts a hand up to his eyes to wipe away the tears, trying to swallow the feeling in his throat though it stubbornly remains.

"There will be a service next week for Detective Rosa Diaz. I expect you all to be there," Captain Holt draws the room's attention again.

With some sort of final nod, Holt steps away from the podium and exits the room. Terry remains in the briefing room, stood awkwardly beside the empty podium. There are tears on his face, glistening in the light of the room.

Abruptly, something bulldozes into him and he almost falls off his seat with the force of a wailing Charles enveloping him in a hug. Jake is still in disbelief, staring silently at the podium where Holt had just stood. Almost on autopilot, he lifts a hand and puts it on Charles' back in comfort. It only seems to make the man cry even more and soon, Jake's hoodie is soaked with tears.

***

_Rosa opens her eyes with the reluctance of someone who's only just gone to sleep and doesn't want to wake up. She feels just like that too. There's a distant pain somewhere in her body, but she can't pinpoint its exact location and she's not sure whether it's worth bothering with or not._

_In the end, she decides to ignore it and for the first time, she looks around at her surroundings. There's not much there. It's just... dark. Like some pitch black abyss that she's fallen into with no way out. She looks up, down, behind her, but it's all the same. Dark._

_She's sure her heart picks up for a moment, thudding desperately with fear and uncertainty, but just as soon, it slows down again. Despite this, she can't shake the feeling that something's wrong. Off. Where is she? She tries to think back to the last thing she remembers, but all that comes to mind is pain. The same pain she can feel now, but more intense. Almost unbearable._

_There's a tickling feeling on her face and she lifts up a hand to rub it, but she's met with something wet. She frowns and pulls her hand away, stares at the limb in the lack of light. There's a liquid on her hands. It's black. Her frown deepens and she quickly moves her hand back up to her forehead and touches it only to find more dampness._

_It's dripping down her forehead, passed her right eyebrow, and down onto her eyelashes. She blinks harshly and rubs her eye with her already wet hand, but, logically, it doesn't make anything better. She pulls her hand back again and stares at the dark liquid. Blood, her mind supplies._

_Almost as soon as the thought comes to her, the pain from before becomes unbearable and she cries out in agony, falling to her knees. Her bloody hands reach up and cup her head where the pain is stemming from as she cries in pain. She's never felt anything like it. It's the worst pain she's ever felt._

_She just wants it to stop._

***

Rosa awakes with a scream torn from her throat and a pain blossoming from her forehead. She winces and brings her hand up to touch it. It's fine.

Opening her eyes, she only finds darkness. Her breath catches in her throat and she looks side to side, but it's all the same. With the nervousness, yet determination of a child walking for the first time, she lifts a hand up and moves it forwards as far as she can. All too soon, her fingers meet cold metal.

"What?" She whispers to herself, voice raspy.

Again, she touches the metal until eventually, she's slamming the palm of her hands qon it. She kicks her leg out and finds that her foot meets the same thing. Just metal. She's in some kind of metal fucking box.

"What the fuck?" She demands, eyes wide yet seeing nothing but darkness.

She keeps kicking and punching, hoping to find some kind of way out. Some weakness in this metal box that will allow her an exit. 

Her hands tremble with each punch she throws at the wall above her, and with each kick, it feels like her leg is about to give out, but she doesn't stop because she has to get out of there. She has no idea where she is, what's happening, how long it's been since she called for backup, but she knows she will not remain stuck in some metal fucking box.

With a well placed kick, a small door opens and light floods into her little box. Her eyes widen gratefully and she doesn't waste another second in sliding out of the rectangular prison and landing on the floor. She finds, as she tries to get up from the cold floor, that her legs are extremely weak, especially after kicking her way out of a metal box. 

Still, she grabs hold of a table and manages to haul herself up onto her bare feet. Once she's up, she looks down with confusion and sees not only is she dressed in some kind of paper, medical gown, but there's also a paper tab on her toe. Frowning, she crouches back down and pulls it off. She reads it as she straightens up again.

It has her name on it as well as a time and date that definitely isn't her birthday. 

Slowly, with horror growing in the pit of her stomach, she looks around her at the room she's in for the first time.

To her right, there's a table with what she already knows is a body hidden beneath a sheet. All around the room, the walls are lined with identical chambers. Most of them are closed while others have doors that are partially open.

She shuffles back a bit until her back hits the chamber she just escaped from. 

She's in a fucking morgue. 


	3. Chapter Two

Swallowing, Rosa shuffles over to the door leading to the exit of the room. She has never been one to shy away from morbid things, has always been a bit prone to violence and still is, even as a detective, but waking up in a morgue has her hands trembling and her throat feeling drier than the Sahara desert. The tag on her foot hits the floor and she stops to pull it off, and throw it to the side. It skids across the floor and lands beneath a medical trolley, hidden from view. 

With a shake of her head, she approaches the door and pulls it open. It opens with a quiet squeak and she peers either way down the hallway revealed to her. There's no one about and that makes her feel a strange sense of anxiety. She doesn't know if she wants to see anyone right now- she has no idea what's going on- but there's something about being alone in a mortuary that has her on edge. 

Steeling herself, she leaves the morgue and chooses a direction at random, hoping it will lead to the exit.

After a few minutes of mindlessly walking down the seemingly endless corridor, she comes to a turning and finds a set of double doors at the end of the adjacent hallway. Filled with relief at the bright exit sign above it, she picks up her pace and half-runs, half-jogs to the doors.

She pushes them open the second she reaches them and finds herself suddenly standing outside. Some ways away, there's a mostly empty car park. There's a middle aged woman in the car park, exiting her vehicle and Rosa finds herself backing up. She looks down at what she's wearing, and shivers, all too aware of how cold it is.

She turns on her heels and heads in the opposite direction to the car park, finding herself thus making her way down towards the alley behind the mortuary. 

When she comes out on the other side of the alleyway, she finds herself on a busy street. She considers turning around and heading back towards the car park, if only to avoid everyone's eyes, but when a woman with a concerned expression pauses and looks as if she's about to approach Rosa, she runs instead.

She barges passed anyone who gets in her way, only one goal in mind. To get home and figure out what the hell is happening.

It takes her a while as she doesn't know where the hell she is, but when she confirms her location, she begins her journey home. 

Several people try to stop her on her way. They're all worried and concerned- one of them even recognises her- but she doesn't stop for any of them, determined to get home.

It's another half an hour before she finally reaches her apartment. She can't help the huge sigh of relief that she gives as she slows down her run and hops up the steps to the door.

She pauses when she reaches it as realisation strikes her. She looks down at what she's still wearing and curses aloud. She doesn't have her keys. She doesn't have anything.

"Damn it!" She slams her hand against the glass of the door and then places her head in her hands.

She has no idea what she's going to do now. She's locked out of her apartment, her belongings are presumably at the mortuary, she's wearing nothing but a flimsy paper gown, and she doesn't know where to go.

"Excuse me, but are you all right?"

Rosa sighs with annoyance, purses her lips, and turns to see a woman with a hyperactive dog attached to a leash, sniffing around. The woman is looking at Rosa with concern.

"I'm fine," Rosa tells her, cursing the way her throat aches with the words, and before the woman can ask anymore questions, she steps away from her apartment stalks off down the path.

The direction she chose leads to a bit of a busier area, but as long as she gets away from the woman, she should be able to circle back in a few minutes and figure something out. There's no way she's going back to the mortuary to get het belongings. Waking up there was enough, she's not willingly going back for a few possessions. She'll break back into her apartment if she has to.

It's as she's walking, keeping as far away from everyone and their piercing eyes as she can (she's never been fond of too much attention), that she realises she's walked further than she intended. She only planned to walk around the block and then go back to her apartment to get away from the woman, yet she's found herself further than she remembers walking.

She pinches the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes tightly as pain blooms behing them. She can't help the wince that forms on her face nor the tears that gather in the corner of her eyes at the pain.

The pain only lasts a few seconds, but it feels like minutes. By the time she opens her eyes again, the street has emptied a bit and she steels herself before continuing on, sticking close to the windows that line pathway.

She turns a corner at random, hoping she can somehow find her way back to her apartment, and pauses when she spots the sign right on the corner of the street. She recognises the name. She looks down the streer and her eye catches on a building in particular. There's nothing spectacular about it, it's just as normal as the rest of the buildings on the street, but somehow this one stands out. 

Without her permission, her feet begin moving, dragging her down the pavement and towards this normal, but not normal apartment.

It takes almost a minute before she's standing in front of the steps that lead to the doorway of the apartment, but when she does, it takes another further minute before she decides to climb them. She knows this apartment, now that she's in front of it and can see it up close, but she doesn't know why she's there or why her body had decided to take her there.

Still, she doesn't stop herself when she reaches forward and presses a number at random on the keypad. A second later, there's a buzz and the door unlocks. She takes that as her invitation and enters the building with only a split hesitation. 

She finds the stairs immediately and begins ascending them, making a face when her bare foot almost makes contact with what's clearly a sticky soda spilled on the stairs.

She passes someone on her way up and gains a strange look, but she chooses to ignore it as she finally reaches the second floor and gazes both ways down the hallway for the door she's looking foor. It's been a while since she was there and her memory is a little rusty of it, but when her eyes lock onto the door she's searching for, she knows it's the one.

With no knowledge of what time it is exactly, she heads to the door and knocks, hoping that the one whose house she's arrived at is there. 

Following her knock, there's no answer even a couple minutes later so she sighs and hangs her head. It somehow makes its way to the wall and she stands like that for who knows how long, wallowing in her own misery, unsure of what to do now. There's no way she's leaving the building, only to get stared at with pity and confusion by random people as she bumbles about, thinking of some kind of plan. 

She's not sure of how much time has passed, but at some point she finds herself sat on the floor outside of the door she'd arrived at, knees drawn to her chest and forehead resting on them. She doesn't care about the few people that pass her by, doesn't even lift her head to see their bemused looks at her sitting in a paper gown outside someone's door.

Anyway, some undetermined amount of time passes and the hallway grows dark as the sun sets, then brightens a little as the dim lights turn on to illuminate the way for people to see. Her shadow is cast on the carpeted floor beside her, stretched and mysterious. She rests her cheek on her arm as she gazes at it blankly. 

The sound of heeled boots thud on the floor, making her ears perk up, but she doesn't lift her head or look away from her shadow to see the expression of whoever has caught her lingering outside the door this time.

That is, until a cough draws her attention, followed by the voice she's been waiting for since arriving.

"Uh, can I help you?" The voice doesn't sound like she wants to help. In fact, she sounds like she wants Rosa to go away.

"I don't know," Rosa admits as she finally looks up into the familiar blue eyes of her friend and coworker, Gina Linetti.

Unexpectedly, and in a move that surprises Rosa, Gina drops her purse and screams. 

"What the hell, Gina, it's just me!" Rosa quickly jumps up to her feet and crosses the hallway to meet Gina.

Gina flinches away, but thankfully, she stops screaming. Still, she stares at Rosa in shock and horror. 

"What the hell _me_?" Gina parrots. "You're a ghost, Rosa!"

"Ghost? I'm not dead, Gina," Rosa scoffs, slightly amused.

"You're _supposed_ to be!" Gina says. "Holt said you were shot!"

"That explains waking up in a morgue," Rosa mutters despite the way she feels sick at what Gina has said and the phantom pain in her head. The memory of floating in nothingness and helplessness assaults her and she can't help the way her throat closes up in terror. 

"Explains your horrible outfit," Gina jokes, but when she laughs it comes out watery.

Rosa's brows furrow, confused. It looks like she's about to cry.

"Um, want to come in?" Gina offers when Rosa doesn't say anything in return.

"If you don't mind," Rosa nods awkwardly. She's not used to accepting help, but she knows she has no choice right now. 

She watches as Gina smiles at her and then reaches down to grab her purse. She opens it and pulls out her keys then moves to her door and unlocks it. She opens the door and then leads the way in. Rosa follows awkwardly.

Gina lets her borrow some othes that aren't flimsy and ugly. Well, they're far from what Rosa would personally choose, but they're better than a paper gown that barely covers anything so she accepts them gratefully without much complaint.

After changing, Gina orders takeout for the both of them and they end up chilling on the couch until it arrives, dutifully ignoring the elephant on the room that is Rosa's living status. Gina's eyes don't move from her phone until their takeout arrives, but that doesn't bother Rosa because it's almsot familiar. She hasn't seen Gina in four months and the background noise of her typing away and occasionally chuckling at whatever shallow thing she has read on Twitter comforts her, in a way.

When the food does arrive, Rosa gets it for them and pays with the money Gina handed her so she can get drinks for them. Once she's paid and brought the food back to Gina, she finds the woman pouring them both drinks into glasses. She hands Gina her order and sits down with her own.

Gina uses the tv remote to change whatever has been playing up until then and then places it down and settles back on the couch with her box of noodles. Rosa is fine with the mutual silence between them, content to sit and eat her food in the other woman's company, but clearly Gina isn't now that she not on her phone.

"So," Gina begins, "you woke up in a morgue?"

Rosa nods silently, eyes glued to the television. 

"What happened? Because according to Terry and Holt, you're dead. But you don't look very dead to me, Diaz," Gina continues.

"I don't know," Rosa grits out. She doesn't want to talk about it because her words are true. She simply does not know what happened. "I was undercover. And then, I woke up in a morgue."

Gina hums thoughtfully. Rosa thinks that's the end of it so she turns back to the TV, but then Gina speaks again.

"Holt and Terry found you. They said you were shot."

She can't help it, but that makes her cry. She's completely against public vulnerability despite the sob that forces its way out of her throat. She shakes her head, puts her food on the coffee table, then covers her face with her trembling hands as her shoulders shake with her sobs.

"I don't know," she tries to get out, but it sounds like a mess of words mushed together. Still, she tries again, though it doesn't sound much better. "I don't know what happened."

She can feel Gina pulling her into her for a hug and, against her better judgement, she wraps her arms around the woman's waist and buries her head into her shoulders. 

"It's okay," Gina murmurs to her, it can hardly be heard over Rosa's crying. "It's okay, girl, you're okay. I've got you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, i hope you all enjoyed this? Lmk, I'd love to hear your thoughts :)
> 
> Kudos/ comments are always appreciated and let me know that you enjoy what I've written xx


	4. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gina: *exists*  
> Rosa: *gay panic intensifies*
> 
> I will go down with this ship

The night seems to drag on after that, but not in a terrible way. Rosa finds herself strangely at ease in Gina's presence, despite the woman's usual urge to belittle everyone. Granted, Rosa hardly ever finds herself on the receiving end of that belittling so she supposes that's why she doesn't mind Gina's company.

And Gina doesn't seem to mind having Rosa at her apartment. In fact, she offers Rosa a place to stay the night. Knowing she doesn't have a way of getting into her own apartment right now lest she breaks into it and attracts any unwanted attention, she finds herself accepting the offer quite easily. 

Following that, Gina leads her through to her bedroom and Rosa lingers awkwardly in the doorway. Despite accepting the offer to stay the night, she isn't sure what she's supposed to do now.

Gina's room is exactly as Rosa would have imagined it (if she ever imagined it- which she hasn't). There's a giant tapestry on the wall above a double bed with an image of a wolf on it. The animal's eyes are piercing, yet Gina doesn't seem to notice. The bed has a fur throw over on it as well as Gina's beloved 'Wolfie'.

There's more shoes lining the room than Rosa has seen in her lifetime as well as a large wardrobe which Rosa can be sure is filled with eccentric clothes Holt won't allow Gina to wear at work. 

Gina moves over to a set of drawers that Rosa hadn't spotted, hidden beside the wardrobe, and pulls one of the drawers open. She rummages around in it as Rosa stands in the doorway, until she smiles and pulls out some clothes.

"Here you go," she returns to Rosa and places the clothes into her hands.

"What's this?" Rosa asks.

"Pyjamas," Gina shrugs, "unless you want to sleep naked? I don't mind." 

Something flashes in Gina's pale eyes and Rosa's hands subconsciously tighten on the pyjamas she's holding.

"Thank you," she says in regards to the pyjamas, choosing to ignore the rest of Gina's sentence.

"No prob," Gina replies then points over Rosa's shoulder, "bathroom is in there."

Rosa turns and sees a door she'd noticed earlier but not paid attention to.

"Thank you," Rosa says again and then backs out of the room to go to the bathroom and change.

She hears Gina hum in response as she reaches the door and quickly enters the bathroom. The door shuts behind her with a click and she lets out a relieved sigh. What the hell is wrong with her? Why is she nervous? It's just Gina for Christ's sake. Since when has she been nervous around Gina?

Unless... 

No. She shakes her head of that thought train and begins to strip herself of the borrowed clothes to put on the pyjamas Gina has also loaned her. The pyjamas consist of a comfortable, white, long-sleeved cotton jumper and a pair of grey shorts that just fit her.

She looks down at herself and groans quietly. The clothes aren't hideous and she knows Gina owns some clothes that she definitely finds horrifying, but she wouldn't even wear this in the comfort of her own home. She isn't exactly the kind of person to wear white, and the shorts are pretty... short.

Well, whatever. Gina has let her borrow them as she doesn't have her own clothes right now, so now isn't the time to be ungrateful.

Unfortunately, she has to forego brushing her teeth for tonight as she doesn't have her toothbrush with her and it doesn't look like Gina has a spare, but she finds a clean flannel and washes her face.

She didn't realise how much she needed to do that, but the second the cold water hits her face, she feels a sense of relief and cleanliness that she hasn't felt in four months. 

After drying her face on a towel, she leaves the bathroom and looks around the apartment to spot Gina. She can't see her though, so she assumes the woman is in her bedroom and she crosses the apartment to the bedroom door. She stands there awkwardly for a moment, looking at the wooden door which is open just a crack. There's light spilling out of the gap so she knows Gina must be awake, but still, she knocks lightly on the door.

"Come in," she hears Gina call.

Following the order, she pushes the door open the rest of the way and stands in the doorway.

"Hey," she greets simply.

"Hey, Rosie," Gina smiles. It's so welcoming that Rosa raises an eyebrow suspiciously. She doesn't comment on the pet name. Even if she told Gina not to call her that, she would proceed to do it anyway. There's not much in the world that can get the woman to not do something.

Gina shuffles back on her bed and pulls the duvet back a bit. She then pats the empty space beside her.

"Are you getting in or what?" Gina asks when Rosa remains where she is.

"You want me to sleep in the same bed as you?" Rosa ventures slowly.

"Of course. Where else would you sleep?"

"I don't know. The couch or something," Rosa shrugs whilst finding herself slowly inching towards the bed anyway.

Gina snorts lightly, as if Rosa's answer is funny.

"Girl, no," Gina shakes her head, "just get in."

"Okay, but if you snore, I will go to the couch," Rosa jokes flatly then finally makes her way to the empty space beside Gina and gets in.

The duvet and throws immediately cover her courtesy of Gina. Then, Gina claps her hands and the lights go off. 

Rosa finds herself laughing. It's so Gina that she can't help it. Gina laughs beside her, though Rosa can hardly see her now in the darkness of the room.

Despite the lights having been turned off, Rosa and Gina stay up at least another hour. Gina talks more than Rosa remembers. Or maybe it's because it's just the two of them right now and there are no work-related distractions to stop them. Either way, Gina comes up with the weirdest things to talk to, most of it revolving around celebrities, and Rosa finds herself listening and replying.

They don't talk about what happened to Rosa while she was undercover, and for that, Rosa is grateful. After her little breakdown earlier, she'd be happy to never talk about it again. Of course, she knows that's impossible if she ever wants to go back to work. Which she does. And she has to tomorrow.

It's Friday tomorrow and she has work. It's her first day back in four months and it's undoubtedly going to be hard if what Gina had said was true (she knows it is). She won't get much sleep, but that's fine. She's not that tired anyway.

* * *

_When Rosa opens her eyes, it's not to the sight she fell asleep to. She doesn't see sunlight streaming through the window of Gina's bedroom and illuminating the wolf tapestry. Nor does she see Gina herself. Instead, she sees nothing._

_She can see her hands in front of her and her legs and chest, and her black hair falling around her shoulders, but the space around her is just that. Empty, dark, terrifying space. She recognises the place she finds herself in, somehow, despite its lack of physical form._

_She floats in the middle of nothing and she feels nothing._

_She doesn't breathe, she doesn't think, she doesn't feel. She just exists._

_And yet, something is determined to make its way into her undead heart._

_Undead. She wonders where that word had come from._

_Wherever it came from, fear wraps its spindly hand around her heart and squeezes with a fury that makes her feel sick. She looks around nothingness with wide eyes, hoping against hope to find something there._

_But there's nothing._

_She's alone, lost in the vast nothingness. Stuck in between feeling nothing in her undead heart and feeling terror in her beating one._

* * *

Rosa jerks awake with as big a breath as she can manage. Her hand finds her throat and she swallows, somehow reassured by the way her throat bobs. Her eyes are attracted to the window on her right and she blinks against the sight of the sun peeking over tall buildings.

She looks away and finds a digital clock on the bedside table. The screen is dim and the top is dusty. Rosa is sure Gina hasn't used the alarm clock since she bought her first phone. It's useful to Rosa now, though, and she sighs at the sight of the number five staring back at her.

Turning her eyes away from the clock, she sees Gina still beside her. She's fast asleep, auburn hair splayed out on her white pillows. She looks angelic, Rosa can't help but think. Then her eyes widen and she shakes her head to rid herself of the thought. Gina is her friend and nothing more. And even if Rosa did want something more (which she doesn't), there's no way that Gina would feel the same.

With a scowl plastered on her face and the tendrils of her horrific dream clinging to the back of her mind, Rosa tosses the duvet off of her body and gets up. The hardwood floor seeps coldness into her bare feet causing her to shiver. 

Once she's up, she quietly exits the bedroom so as to not wake Gina. The rest of the apartment is illuminated by the rising sun trickling in through the window behind the couch. Despite that and the lovely orange glow set about the apartment, Rosa crosses to the light switch and turns it on. 

Somehow, she finds herself at the kitchen, cooking omelettes. She's not sure if Gina likes omelettes, but she'll find out when the woman wakes up. Which should be another hour or so, probably. 

In half an hour, she has two plates placed carefully on the coffee table. One for her and one for Gina. And since Gina isn't awake yet, she decides to grab the clothes Gina let her borrow yesterday. She takes them to the bathroom and quickly puts them on.

By the time she exits the bathroom, Gina is in the kitchen, making herself a cup of coffee. Once she turns and spots Rosa, she smiles in greeting. 

"Morning, Rosie," she says.

"Hey," Rosa replies, then points at the omelettes on the coffee table. "I made omelettes."

"I could hear," Gina states as she crosses from the kitchen and takes a seat on the couch. "Smells great."

Rosa joins her on the couch and takes her omelette. 

As Gina starts to eat her omelette, Rosa takes the moment to thank the other woman.

"Thank you for letting me stay here," she starts, "you didn't have to, so... thank you."

"It's no problem, honestly," Gina shrugs, "but you still haven't told me why you were lingering outside my house."

Rosa blushes slightly at the use of the word 'lingering'. It makes her sound desperate. 

"I couldn't get into my apartment. I don't have my keys. I think they're at the morgue still," she reveals.

"Ah, and you came to me for help," Gina smirks.

"What? No, I just... I don't know," Rosa sighs.

"It's okay, Rosa, I don't mind," Gina reassures her, "besides, you're good company."

Rosa doesn't know what to reply to that. She's rarely ever been told she's 'good company'. Especially not by Gina.

"I think we should get ready for work," she says.

"You're going to work?" Gina asks.

"Sure. Why wouldn't I?"

"Uh, not to state the obvious, Rosie, but everyone thinks you're dead," Gina points out.

"I know," Rosa sighs, "but that's why I have to go."

Gina leans back on the couch. 

"I guess. Can you imagine their faces though?" She laughs.

"I wonder if they'll be anything like yours?" Rosa jokes, thankful for a chance to ease the tension that had been brewing.

"Ugh, don't remind me. Oh, and if you're going back to work, you can borrow some more clothes."

"Thank you," Rosa nods gratefully.

"Come on, let's get ready. I can already tell today is going to be crazy."

* * *

Thankfully, the clothes Gina lets her borrow this time aren't as bad as the first set or the pyjamas. She's given a long sleeve black jumper and a pair of dark grey jeans. It's more like something she would actually wear, this time and she's relieved.

And, as it turns out, Gina does have a spare toothbrush. She hands her the still boxed toothbrush and Rosa heads to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face.

Once she's done that, she exits the bathroom and waits for Gina to finish up. It takes another half an hour for the woman to get ready and Rosa finds herself staring out of the window at the cars passing by below.

"Okay, I'm ready."

Rosa turns away from the window to see Gina leaving the bathroom. Apparently it took her half an hour because she was doing her makeup. Rosa rolls her eyes and waits for Gina to grab her purse before following the other woman out of her apartment.

"Can we stop for coffee on the way?" Rosa asks.

"Try and stop me," Gina says as she locks her door, "we're going to need it, girl."

As agreed, the pair drive halfway to the Nine-Nine before stopping at a small coffee shop that Gina apparently frequents. As Rosa currently has no money on her, Gina buys her drink and Rosa promises to pay her back.

She downs the coffee like her life depends on it- and, honestly? It feels like it does.

With their beverages downed, Rosa and Gina return to Gina's car and buckle up. Rosa sits quietly as Gina turns Beyoncé on, on the radio and tries to calm her nerves. She shouldn't feel so nauseous at the idea of going back to the Nine-Nine, yet that's exactly how she feels anyway.

It feels like the journey lasts five seconds before they're pulling up in the car park and Gina is turning off the engine. As Gina unbuckles her seatbelt and grabs her purse, Rosa remains seated, looking out of the windshield and the familiar building.

"Rosa?"

Rosa turns to her left where Gina is still in the driver's seat, watching her. 

"You okay?" She asks.

"I'm fine," Rosa tells her.

"It's okay to be nervous, you know," Gina says, "after everything that's happened if there's anyone who deserves to feel nervous, it's you."

"I know, I just... I don't know. What if they take this badly and don't want me back?" It feels stupid to say it aloud, but Gina doesn't look at her like she's grown a second head or anything.

"Rosa," Gina says seriously as she puts her hands on Rosa's upper arms and turns her to face her properly, "there might be a little screaming, yes, and Charles might faint, but considering the circumstances, that's normal. But there's nothing in this world that could make them _not_ want you back. The past few days have been hard on us all because all we wanted was you back. It hasn't been the same without you. We missed you."

Rosa doesn't know which part of that sentence started it, all she knows is that she's crying. She lifts her hand up and wipes away the tears trailing down her cheeks with a nod.

"Didn't know you had that in you, Linetti," she jokes which causes Gina to smile.

"Yeah, well, don't go telling everybody, kay?" Gina retorts, "come on."

They finally exit the car and Gina checks the time and informs her they're five minutes late. It's normal for Gina to be late, though, so Rosa goes along with it.

Getting into the building is harder than it usually is considering everyone either stares at them in horror or stops them to ask what the hell is going on. Thankfully, Gina bullies her way through everyone with threats of telling Captain Holt that they're stopping her from getting to work.

It works. 

They make it to the elevator ten minutes later than necessary and Rosa presses the button to their floor. As the doors close, she leans her head back against the wall and sighs.

"It'll be okay, trust me," Gina reassures her with a hand on her arm.

When the elevator slows to a stop and dings, Rosa leans away from the wall and forces her nerves to calm down. It'll be fine. 

The doors slowly pry apart and Rosa is met with the sound of people working, but barely any talking. Most of the noise comes from the perps in the holding cell. She turns to Gina and raises an eyebrow.

"It's been like this since Holt told us... you know," Gina tells her then steps out of the elevator, leaving Rosa to follow.

Despite now being at work, Rosa finds herself awkwardly following Gina to her desk, somehow not knowing what to do now. What does one do after coming back from the dead, anyway? There's no advice for this.

Gina sits down at her desk and takes her phone out to check her notifications.

"You good, Rosa?" Gina asks as she looks over her phone at her.

"Yeah, I just... what do I do?" Rosa asks quietly.

"I don't know," Gina shrugs, "maybe you should talk to Holt? He'll be here soon. Probably."

"Probably?" Rosa prompts.

"Yeah, he's been taking everything super hard lately," Gina informs her, "like I said, he and Terry found you."

Rosa is about to reply to that, that dreadful feeling of guilt from last night tightening around her windpipe, when they're interrupted.

"Morning, Gina," Jake's familiar voice greets her ears. It doesn't sound as chipper as it usually does. "Can you-"

He pauses and Rosa looks up to see him now stood beside her, paler than she's ever seen him, and eyes wide. 

"-Oh, my God! What the hell?" He screams and drops the paperwork he'd been handing Gina.

"Jakey! What is it? Are you okay?" Charles' distinct voice joins the shouting and then suddenly, as he comes into Rosa's line of sight and he sees her, the man limply falls to the floor, unconscious.

"What the hell is going on here?" Terry runs into the bullpen from wherever he'd been and comes to an abrupt stop at Gina's desk. "Oh, my God, Rosa! How is- I mean, what the hell? How is this possible?"

"Would anyone like to explain to me why you are all gathered around Gina's desk and why Detective Boyle is on the floor again?"

Rosa's hands tighten on Gina's desk and she tenses.

"Rosa- Rosa is- I think I'm having a panic attack," Jake tries to get out, waving one of his hands about while the other rests in his hip.

Ignoring him, Rosa turns around to face Captain Holt. He's wearing his coat and his briefcase is in his hand, letting her know he's just arrived to work.

"Detective Diaz," Holt greets her, "you were dead. How is this possible?"

Finally, Gina puts her phone down jumps in.

"Who cares? She's alive now and that's all that matters," she tells Holt.

"No offense, Gina, but she was shot in the head. There's no possible way she can be here right now," Terry says.

That explains her head pain, then. Rosa's hand unconsciously lifts to touch her forehead where the pain keeps returning. It's probably something she should worry about.

"Okay, but she is," Gina points out, "who cares? We should just be grateful she is here."

"I suppose," Captain Holt agrees with Gina, but there's something on his stoic face that makes Rosa think he's still unsure. "At any rate, I would like to talk to you in my office, Rosa."

"Yes, sir," Rosa nods towards him.

"The rest of you, back to work," Holt addresses the rest of the precinct.

Slowly and reluctantly, the rest of the precinct returns to their desks and resume whatever they'd been doing before. With a final look towards Gina, Rosa follows Holt into his office. 


	5. Chapter Four

Rosa follows Captain Holt into his office and slowly closes the door behind herself. Holt moves to place his bag down behind his desk and hangs up his coat on the coat stand. All the while, Rosa waits awkwardly on the other side of the desk. 

When Holt finally sits down in his chair, he gestures to the one in front of Rosa, requesting she sit down. Following the unsaid order, Rosa pulls the chair out and sits on it.

"As relieved as I am to see you... well, alive and well, Detective, I'm sure you know what I'm going to ask?" Holt begins, cutting straight to the point as Rosa had expected.

She nods silently, awaiting the question.

" _How_ is it that you're alive? As Sergeant Jeffords so aptly put it, you were shot in the head."

Rosa swallows. She can't even begin to imagine what it must have been like for Holt and Terry to find her, a bullet hole in her head, blood everywhere. Head wounds are always messy, there's always so much blood. To see that on someone you know, someone you work with, someone you consider a friend... It must have been horrifying.

Waking up in a morgue probably doesn't even begin to compare what Terry and Holt saw. 

"I don't know," she admits, just like she did with Gina. This time, though, she forces the tears away. "I remember being undercover and then nothing. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in a morgue."

Holt hums and rests his elbows on his desk, placing his fingertips together in front of himself.

"How unusual," he says simply. "I noticed a moment ago when Sergeant Jeffords mentioned what happened that you touched your forehead. You were shot in the head, it wouldn't be unusual to experience some pain."

His voice is prying, suggestive. It's not a question, but Rosa knows he's asking if she _is_ in pain.

She thinks about the lingering pain that blooms at the front of her head every so often and how it can be unbearable. She thinks of the strange dreams she's had and tries to decipher what they mean, only for the details of the dreams to slip from her mind just as quickly like sand in an hourglass.

Then she pushes all thoughts aside and focuses on answering her captain. He's looking at her expectantly, waiting for an answer.

"I'm fine," she says in stead of divulging what she's actually feeling.

She wants her job back, she wants to come back to the Nine-Nine if he'll let her and she's not going to ruin her opportunity by making herself seem weak.

"Well, that's good," Holt nods sincerely, "you're very fortunate, Detective. Now, I'm assuming you would like to come back to the Nine-Nine? To resume your position here."

"I would," Rosa confirms.

"I would love to have you rejoin us here. Though, after what you've been through, your... experience waking up in a morgue. It must have been quite traumatic-"

Rosa opens her mouth to deny his words, reassure him that she's completely fine, but he continues on. 

"-you may continue working here, Detective, but I would like to have Sergeant Jeffords schedule you for a psyche evaluation and a check-up from a medical professional. You will also be on desk duty for the following month until we're sure you're fit to return to work."

"A medical professional?" Rosa repeats. Desk duty doesn't bother her and she's had more psyche evals than she can count on both hands, but there's no way she's letting some doctor poke and prod her with needles to try and figure out what brought her back. "That's not necessary, sir, I'm fine. I'm not in any pain."

"That may be the case, Detective, but it's always better to be on the safe side," Holt informs her.

"Sir-" Rosa tries.

"Dismissed," Holt interrupts with a flippant gesture of his hand, "you'll find your badge and gun with Sergeant Jeffords. Send Gina in on your way out, please." 

Rosa sits in her seat as Holt picks up his pen and begins his paper work. Her mouth is partially open, as if ready to argue some more, but she can't find the words. Holt isn't paying attention to her anymore anyway.

Reluctantly, she rises from her seat and turns to exit the office. Before she can open the door, her hand pauses on the handle and she partially turns her head to see Captain Holt. 

"It's good to see you too, Captain," she tells him then leaves the room before he can reply.

She stops in front of Gina's desk, as requested, and tells her that Holt wants to speak to her. 

Gina groans dramatically and locks her phone, putting it in her pocket as she rises from her desk and enters Holt's office.

Rosa sighs. She turns and faces the bullpen. Her eyes lock onto her desk and she notices that it's exactly the same as it was before she went undercover. Nothing has been touched, except for that fact that she no longer has a stapler. A smile twitches at the corner of her lips but she quickly forces it back and makes her way over to her desk.

She's just reached it when something barrels into her side and she almost topples to the floor. It's only the arms of whoever has attacked her that stops her from falling over. 

A head of neat black hair and the sound of crying has her rolling her eyes.

"Charles, what the hell?" She demands, but it lacks her usual annoyance.

"You have no idea how happy I am to see you!" Charles cries into her shoulder.

"Uh, it's okay," she awkwardly comforts, patting his arm as much as she can with her limited movement.

"Hey, Charles, give her some space."

Rosa has never been so relieved to hear Amy's voice. She sighs gratefully as Charles quickly steps back away from her and wipes away his tears.

Unfortunately, she only gets a few seconds more of freedom before Amy wraps her arms around her and squeezes tightly. Then, she sees Jake rise from his desk and join the hug. Charles returns to it and then Scully and Hitchcock take it upon themselves to wrap their arms around the group. 

She would have never guessed those two would have missed her, but there they are. Either that or they just saw a group hug and decided they wanted in on it.

From the corner of her eye, she sees Terry returning to the bullpen. She sees the moment he spots them all, gathered in the middle of the precinct, and she also sees the moment his concentrated frown turns into a smile. She rolls her eyes and groans as he hurries over to them all and joins in on the hug.

She allows it to go on for another minute before getting annoyed of the physical contact.

"Okay, that's enough!" She tells them all.

As expected, they all quickly let go of her but they don't stray far. They only step back a few steps to give her some space, then linger there, clearly waiting for something. 

"What?" She demands.

Amy hastily wipes a tear from beneath her eye and smiles widely.

"Nothing, we're just so happy to have you back," she reveals.

Rosa has to bite back a smile at the words as she looks away. 

"Thanks," she mutters.

When Hitchcock and Scully return to their desks and begin to eat whatever it is they've got spread across their work spaces, the others take that as their cue to leave too. She shakes her head at the smiles that seem glued to her coworkers' and friends' faces.

As the others disperse, she spots Terry also heading to his desk and makes to follow him to get her badge and gun back. 

"Hey, Sarge," she greets while Terry sits down.

"It's good to see you, Rosa," Terry says by way of greeting.

"You too," Rosa returns the sentiment.

"What can I do for you?" Terry asks.

"The Captain told me you have my badge and gun?"

"Oh, right!" Terry nods and opens his desk drawer to retrieve the items.

He rummages around before finding them and taking them out. Rosa has never been so relieved to see her badge. It's been a long four months and this feels like Christmas come early for her.

She quickly accepts the badge and puts it on then takes the harness and gun and slip her arms into them. The familiar feel of her gun holster and badge back on her person has her sighing gratefully. 

"Thank you, Sarge," she tells Terry sincerely.

"No problem," Terry says, "I, uh, couldn't bring myself to get rid of them."

Rosa nods in understanding, "thanks."

Following that, she steps away from Terry's desk and heads across the bullpen to her own. She settles down in the seat and turns on her computer monitor.

The screen lights up blue and Rosa purses her lips with annoyance. Stupid computer has always been temperamental. To get it working again, she hits the side a couple of times, but nothing happens.

"Seriously?" She mutters to herself as she hits it again.

Four months away and her computer still isn't working. She could have sworn she'd told Gina to get the IT department to take a look at it before she left.

Looking up from her desk, she spies Gina has left Holt's office at some point and is now back at her desk using her computer.

She turns back to her own computer screen which has now turned black and she rolls her eyes. She needs the bathroom anyway. That coffee earlier is finally catching up with her. 

With a frustrated sigh, she gets up from her seat and turns to head down the corridor for Babylon. Hopefully it's still the same. Gina has had four months to Gina-fy it and add all of the things Rosa refused to let her.

She moves down the corridors confidently, unbothered by the strange looks she receives from other cops who clearly haven't yet heard the news that she's back. 

When she's almost at Babylon, she speeds up just a bit, eager for somewhere to be by herself even for just a few minutes.

"Hey, Rosie!"

Rosa falters in her step and then pauses, turning around to find Gina catching up to her. 

"Where are you going?" Gina asks as she reaches Rosa.

"Babylon," Rosa tells her simply, "where are you going?"

"Oh, same. Come on," Gina links her arm through Rosa's and begins to lead her the rest of the way to Babylon.

As much as Rosa wants to complain and unlink their arms, she relents fairly quickly and allows Gina to drag her down the corridor.

When they arrive, Gina does the honours of pulling the crates away to reveal their shared, secret bathroom. Blessedly, Rosa notices that it looks the same as before she went undercover.

"I'm going first," she states quickly to Gina and enters the bathroom.

"Fine by me, girl," Gina nods, closing the door behind Rosa.

As Rosa takes a seat on the toilet, she rolls her eyes when Gina begins to talk through the door. 

"So, you're on desk duty?" She hears Gina ask casually. There's no judgement in her voice, for that Rosa is thankfully.

"Yeah," Rosa confirms, "Captain's orders until he can be sure I'm ready to go back on the field."

"Oh, yeah, makes sense," Gina replies, "which reminds me. Your first psyche eval is tomorrow. Ten AM."

"Great," Rosa mutters with a roll of her eyes.

She gets up and buttons her jeans, then heads to the sink and begins washing her hands with the lavender-scented hand wash. 

"Hey, since you still don't have your keys, you want to stay at my place again?" Is the first thing Gina asks when Rosa opens the door.

"What?" Rosa retorts, caught off guard by the question.

"I mean, you still don't have a way back into your own apartment, so why not stay at mine again?"

"I wouldn't want to intrude," Rosa mutters awkwardly.

Admittedly, she's been thinking of ways to break into her own apartment since last night. So far, she hasn't come up with a solution that will allow her to break in unnoticed.

"Oh, it's no problem. Honestly, I don't mind," Gina shrugs.

"I mean, if you're sure," Rosa relents with a subtle nod.

"I am. Now, wait for me, I need to use Babylon."

Gina slides past her into the bathroom before Rosa can walk away and closes the door in her face.

"Fine," Rosa mutters to herself, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed.

That familiar pain tingles in her forehead again and her jaw clenches against it as her eye twitches. Her fingers tighten around her biceps and her breath deepens. It feels like something is drilling through her skull. Like the worst migraine in the world, it makes her eyes hurt.

Her vision merges together and fades, then turns white as her eyes close against her will.

The next thing she finds is something pressed against her throat. With furrowed brows, she pushes it away from her and forces herself to sit up.

"Oh, thank God. I thought you were dead, Rosa!"

Rosa opens her eyes slowly and finds the blurry form of Gina crouched in front of her. She rubs her eyes and when she next opens them, Gina is much clearer. 

"What happened?" She asks Gina as she uses the wall to stand up.

"Girl, I don't know! I left Babylon and you were on the floor," Gina recounts, pointing at the floor for emphasis. 

Looking at her through her squinted, pained vision, Rosa can tell she's worried so she sighs and rubs her forehead.

"Oh, Well, it doesn't matter. I'm fine," she tells Gina in hopes of being reassuring.

"Uh, I think it does, Rosie. Look, you were shot in the head and killed, and now you're no longer dead but randomly passing out? Something's wrong," Gina says seriously.

"There's nothing wrong, I'm fine," Rosa repeats herself.

"No you're not," Gina shakes her head, "I think you need to see someone."

Rosa snorts with amusement.

"Yeah, sure. Hey, doc, I'm supposed to be dead, but instead I woke up in a morgue and now there's something happening to me. What's your diagnosis?" Rosa snaps with sarcasm.

"Okay, I see your point, but you have to tell someone," Gina pleads, "something is happening, Rosa." 

It's the first time Rosa has ever seen Gina look genuinely worried over another person's well-being.

"I'm fine," Rosa grinds out through clenched teeth, "and if you tell anyone what happened, I'll hurt you."

The threat comes naturally, like it's second nature when in a vulnerable state, but somehow, she still doesn't feel any better. Especially at the shock on Gina's face.

Hastily, she moves past Gina and begins to walk away, back down the corridor towards the bullpen. 

As she leaves, she hears Gina calling out to her. 

"Yeah? I'd like to see you try, Rosie!"

Rosa rolls her eyes at the nickname and rounds the corner as quick as she can.

* * *

When she returns to the bullpen, she takes a seat at her desk and picks up whatever paperwork she can find. She grabs a pen with more force than necessary and begins filling out the form. 

The background noise of Hitchcock and Scully talking about food, and Charles telling Jake something uninteresting is somehow comforting and she finds herself relaxing and filling the form out a little less aggressively. 

After around ten minutes, Gina passes by her desk and places a file on top of the form Rosa is filling out. Rosa looks up flatly and glares at the woman as she returns to her desk without a word. 

With a sigh, Rosa looks down at the file and notices that there's a sticky note stuck to the front of it. 

It reads:

" _fine i wont tell any1 but i still think u should do something xoxo Gina_ "

With pursed lips, Rosa screws the note up and tosses it in the bin beside her desk. She looks up at Gina across from her own desk and shakes her head. Gina shrugs in response and picks up her phone.

With a scoff, Rosa moves the file aside and resumes filling out the form, phantom pain clinging to the back of her mind. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Admittedly, ive only been unconscious once and that was because i was kicked in the head. Plus, it was only for a few seconds, so i dont have much experience with passing out, which is why i went on my sole experience with unconsciousness where everything went white
> 
> Anyways, i hope you enjoyes this chapter, kudos/comments are always greatly appreciated and i would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter or what you would like to see/ think is going to happen in the future


	6. Chapter Five

Heedless of Gina's requests, Rosa did not, in fact, talk to anyone. She preferred to, instead, deal with everything on her own and if that meant snapping at everyone, including Gina, that even attempted to ask her if she was okay, then so be it.

She attended her mandatory psyche eval but only because Holt was really set on it. Usually, she would have figured out a way to worm her way out of it but because she could tell her Captain was worried about her in his own way, she went.

The woman she had to talk to was an idiot in Rosa's opinion, but she painfully sat and put herself through the session and made easy work of making herself seem like a perfectly normal citizen. She didn't talk about the dreams she'd had and how the all encompassing darkness she found herself floating in each time fell asleep scared the hell out of her.

She didn't talk about how her return from the dead scared her just as much, how confused she was, how the blank space in her memory made her feel a sense of anxiety and nausea so strong she wanted to vomit in the nearest trash can.

She mentioned none of that to the woman across from her. She said what the woman clearly wanted to hear and then sighed with relief when she was dismissed. 

When the time for her medical checkup came around, she reluctantly allowed Gina to come with her but only because she'd already asked Holt and been given permission. Holt said it would probably be good for her anyway to have someone by her side.

With the kind of reluctance of somebody who who'd been woken up too early, Rosa entered the sterile room with the man assigned to give her a checkup. He was wearing a mask over his nose and mouth, had on a pair of blue latex gloves, and a pristine white coat that met his knees.

Rosa hadn't been told the man's name, but from the badge clipped to his breast pocket, and his greeting when she sat down, she learned it was Dr. Blackwood. 

Gina had been left outside the room on a chair outside the door, and Rosa found herself wishing the woman was with her now if only so she had something to focus on rather than the way the doctor was organising his medical equipment.

She managed to stay mostly calm for the majority of her checkup, allowing the man to view the back of her throat, her pupil dilation, her reflexes, blood pressure and other ridiculous stuff. 

It was only when she saw the man turn around to go back to his medical trolley that she felt an overwhelming surge of terror fall over her. It felt like her soul had left her body. 

"Now, I'm going to take a blood sample, if that's okay," the doctor said, but without waiting for an answer she saw him take out a new needle.

Rosa barely got a protest out before blackness crept up on the edges of her vision and her suddenly heavy eyes fluttered uselessly.

...

The next thing Rosa was aware of was something tapping her cheek irritatingly. She scrunched her nose and attempted to bat the hand away but only managed to hit herself in the forehead instead.

"What's happening?" She attempted to ask, but it came out as a jumble of mixed words instead. 

"She's awake," someone said.

With great effort, Rosa managed to slowly blink her eyes open. Everything was blurry and bright, but after rubbing her eyes with her thumb and forefinger, her vision cleared up a little. 

It turned out it was Gina who had been tapping her cheek and the one who'd spoken.

"What happened?" Rosa tried again and this time, it was clear for Gina to understand.

"You passed out, boo," Gina told her.

"What?" Rosa asked, confused.

"When the doc had to take your blood. You passed out."

That made sense. Rosa hated needles and she hated having her blood taken even more. Mostly because it involved the use of a needle, but also because her blood should stay in her body where it belonged.

"Oh," Rosa said.

"It's cool, though, cause he's taken your blood. We can go home now," Gina informed her whilst helping her get off the chair.

"Wait, what?" Rosa asked.

She looked over to Dr. Blackwood to see him standing by his medical trolley again. He smiled and held up a vial filled with red liquid. Rosa glared at him and allowed Gina to lead her out of the room with a quick thank you to the doctor.

It was only when Rosa was walking alongside Gina through the hallway on their way out of the building that she realised what Gina had said.

"Wait, 'home'?" She frowned. 

"Yeah," Gina shrugged, "I mean, we're not going back to the precinct."

"Why not?"

"What, do you want to?" Gina asked sarcastically.

Rosa considered it for a moment then shook her head. Going home (or, back to Gina's considering she was still staying at her house for the moment) sounded much better than sitting around at her desk doing boring paperwork.

That was one thing she hadn't missed when she'd gone undercover. The paperwork. 

...

When they arrived back at Gina's place, Rosa hung her back on the back of the nearesr chair and slumped down on the couch. She nursed the crook of her elbow where she could feel a small bandaid had been stuck, courtesy of her doctor.

She sat in silence, barely listening as Gina talked to her from the kitchen though she was grateful for the background noise.

A minute or so later, when Rosa found herself having a staring competition with herself in the reflection of the tv, Gina walked over to the couch and placed two glasses down on the coffee table in front of them. 

"Whiskey?" Rosa asked.

"Of course," Gina confirmed, voice low.

Rosa stared at her for a second before reaching for the glass and picking it up. The ice clinked loudly as she brought it up to her lips and drank some of it.

"Want to watch a movie? I have Nancy Meyers movies," Gina offered.

And how could Rosa refuse? Gina knew her well and knew she was a fan of Nancy.

"Sure," she said then watched with amusement as Gina hopped up from the couch and began rummaging through her DVD rack for a Nancy Meyers movie.

A few minutes later and Gina had put her chosen movie into the TV and drawn the curtains, plunging the apartment into near darkness. 

Rosa didn't protest. It felt more like they were at a cinema. Plus, watching a movie with Gina might be better than watching one in a movie anyway, with screaming children and people who can't eat popcorn quietly. 

Gina settled back on the couch and placed the remote on the coffee table in front of them for easy access. Then, to Rosa's bemusement, she procured Wolfie from somewhere nearby and draped it over herself and Rosa.

"What're you doing?" Rosa asked.

"I'm cold," Gina said simply, bringing the blanket up to her chin.

Rosa wanted to ask why that meant the blanket was on her, too, but she didn't. 

"It's not cold," she said instead.

"You know I get cold, Rosie," Gina whined.

Funnily, Rosa didn't know that little fact about Gina, but she didn't point that out. Reluctantly, she relaxed into the couch and turned her gaze towards the tv. 

She didn't comment when Gina progressively began inching closer to her throughout the movie, or when, near the end, her legs somehow ended up draped over Rosa's lap under the blanket.

No. Instead, she pretended to be asleep and stayed that way until she really was.

* * *

_Rosa would have groaned with annoyance the second she opened her eyes if she could have. Alas, she couldn't and so she simply looked around slowly at her surroundings (or lack of) and allowed herself to float in the nothingness enveloping her._

_By now, she couldn't help but be confused and concerned by her constant appearance in wherever she was everytime she fell asleep. Surely it must mean something, to constantly dream of floating in darkness._

_She'd never dreamt of it before. Not since her death anyway. She wondered, briefly, if maybe it meant something. If it was connected to her recent resurrection._

_Perhaps when she woke up- if she woke up- she would search on the internet. See if anyone else had experienced anything like this. What other people's experiences with resurrection entailed._

_..._

_What was she talking about, again?_

_She blinked against a sudden brightness and frowned in confusion. Her eyes trailed upwards, or where she assumed was upwards, and focused on an unusual bright light beaming down into the darkness._

_Muffled voiced reached her ears, like she was hearing people on the beach from in the ocean, and she slowly lifted a hand up in the direction of the light, wondering if she could touch it._

_Through where the light began, she could almost see something. Other people, perhaps. It was like an over-enhanced movie playing above her, with crappy audio._

_The beams of light that shone down from somewhere up in the darkness almost burned her skin, but it was a pleasant kind of burn, she decided as her eyes began to drift close._

_The muffed voices began to change as she listened idly, warping and twisting until there was only one voice left. A feminine voice. Calling her name._

_"... Rosa? Ro...sa?"_

* * *

"Rosa, come on. We're going to be late for work. Usually I wouldn't care, but I know you do, boo."

Rosa groaned and turned away from Gina's invasive voice.

"Come on, sleeping beauty, you can complain all you want when we actually get to work. For now, you gotta get _up_ ," Gina pulled the blanket away from Rosa, and Rosa rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she grumbled, slowly clambering into a sitting position.

She noticed she was still on the couch, only this time the drinks from last night were gone and the curtains were once again open.

"What time is it?" She asked Gina.

"Half seven," Gina told her.

"Shit, why didn't you say something?" Rosa asked.

"I did! You're the one who wouldn't wake up," Gina retorted.

"Whatever," Rosa pulled a hand through her hair then winced when her fingers got caught in her curls, "mind if I take a quick shower?"

"Be my guest, boo," Gina gestured to the bathroom, "there's towels in the cupboard."

"Thanks," Rosa flashed a small, grateful smile and then wandered off into the bathroom.

...

Just over an hour later and Rosa had showered, brushed her teeth, and gotten dressed. She'd put on a little bit of makeup using some stuff that Gina had bought but never used, and then dried her hair in Gina's room using a hairdryer which, for some reason, was in Gina's handbag.

When she was ready, they didn't have much time to get to work so they left straight away, Gina hurriedly eating a bagel as the rushed to her car.

As Gina got in the driver's seat, Rosa hesitated, overcome with a strange feeling that she was being watched. She turned her head this way and that, trying to spot anyone watching her, but she didn't see anyone. She frowned with confusion. She couldn't shake the feeling.

"Rosa, come on, girl, we're going to be late!" Gina called from the car.

Rosa ignored her and proceeded to watch everyone that passed her by. Eventually, when the feeling vanished, she slowly got into the passenger seat of Gina's car and buckled up.

"You okay?" Gina asked with a hint of concern.

"Yeah, I just..." She trailed off, unsure of what to say.

"What?" Gina prompted.

"Nothing," Rosa shook her head and forced herself to forget the feeling of being watched, "let's go."

"M'kay, if you're sure," Gina shrugged and started the engine.

As they drove, Rosa watched the buildings and people whizz by out of the window. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please don't hate me, I'm just a sucker for some good old fashioned angst. Also, as you can probably tell from the tags, this won't last for long so don't be too upset :')
> 
> Thank you for reading, i hope you all enjoyed xx


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